A “Real” Family

Our real family started in the car that day, driving home from the doctor’s office. It all boiled down to one question: did we want to be pregnant or did we want to be parents?  At the red light we looked at each other.  “Parents,” we both said, “We want to be parents.”   I’m not […]

Milk and Mother God

“Can a woman forget her baby or show no compassion for the child of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you.”    Isaiah 49:15 I have repeated this verse over and over again, arguing for inclusive language, expansive imagery for God beyond “Heavenly Father,” the primary image to which many […]

Should I Stay, or Should I Go?

The first church I served didn’t have a parental leave policy in place when I was called.  As a seminarian, the congregation supported me through marriage and ordination; then they called me as the associate minister with a focus on serving families, youth and children.  Anticipating that some day, my husband and I would decide […]

Where Everybody Knows your Name

Our family lost a beautiful, perfect, planned, wanted, beloved baby on July 4. Since then, lots of things have been helping me make it through each day, while other things ping a deep, visceral response that is less than helpful. A lot of days, I find that the things that I rely on to help […]

Diapering “Baby Jesus”

The parish Christmas pageant took place today.  My nine-month-old son was slated to play the baby Jesus.  There was no competition for that role this year, despite my efforts to recruit a few of my not-so-churchy friends who had recently had babies. Usually, the parents of the infant playing baby Jesus also play the roles […]

Thanks and Giving

I teach my son thankfulness and the practices of gratitude. I teach him to say “thank you” when someone gives him something. As soon as he learns his letters I will teach him to write thank you notes. We say prayers before bed every night (Okay, most nights; bedtime is hard) and that includes thanks […]

Choosing to Serve

“Choose this day whom you will serve…but as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”         Joshua 24:15 Every choice we make to do one thing is a choice not to do another. One of the choices I made earlier on was to devote my life to serving God’s […]

What is Most Important

I lost it twice. I broke down crying, wondering what has happened to me and my life and how in the world I could be both a mom and a minister.  I had two weeks until the start of school, and then things would change, but this summer turned out to be harder than I […]

Simple Things: On Welcoming Families with Children

I have attended almost every conference that The Young Clergy Women Project has hosted, but the conference in Nashville last month was the first one that offered childcare as part of the registration process.  The conference committee performed the amazing feat of transforming two Divinity school classrooms into kid and baby-friendly spaces.  They thought of […]

Making Lists: One Mom’s Response to the Trayvon Martin Case

As a wife, mother, and clergy person I struggle with what to tell my son about Trayvon Martin.  As the mother of a five-month old black male, I am particularly concerned about what I will tell him.  There will be a day when my son will ask me some hard questions and I hope I […]